Good Evening and welcome to NonPro news. My name is Lindsey Saultz and here are tonight’s top stories.
We’ve known for a while that the German’s were an intolerant bunch, but it wasn’t until Monday that the world found out just how intolerant. A bus drive in Lindau reinstated the “move to the back of the bus” law. However, cleavage, not skin color, was the basis for discrimination.
A twenty-year old sales clerk was asked to move because she was too sexy. She reported that the driver said, and I quote.
“Your cleavage is distracting me every time I look into my mirror and I can’t concentrate on the traffic. If you don’t sit somewhere else, I’m going to have to throw you off the bus.”
I wonder if that can be held up in a court of law. If he crashed the bus, who would be at fault? Could her ta-tas be used as a legitimate reason, like say rain or snow, for his lack of attention to the road? Hmmm…
In other news, a man in Washington had different distraction to deal with. It only took five days after he brought his huge environmentally- unfriendly Hummer home for his hippie, tree hugging neighbors to vandalize it. Two masked men were seen smashing in the windows, slashing the tires, and carving “For the Environ” into the paint.
Seems to me that some ones are a little too into Carrie Underwood. See, even good ‘ole country music turns people to the dark side. Who woulda thunk?
And finally, talk about a job that really stinks – pun intended. Archeologists in California have begun digging in a spot where outhouses stood about 130 years ago. Along with 19th century artifacts, they have uncovered a mystery…
They found a pistol, a knife, whiskey flasks, set of false teeth, two dog skulls, and a blade from a set of sheep shears.
Project Archeologist John Foster said, “It might be an early crime scene. It looks like two dogs were decapitated. Then, whoever did it dumped the skulls and the blades in the outhouse. He was probably sure someone wouldn’t look too deep into the privy.”
Well, even back then they flushed their pets down the john. A tradition that persists generation after generation I guess. Maybe it’s just me, but I always thought it disturbing. Seeing poor little Jerry swirling in the throne and being sucked away.
Anyway, that is going to conclude tonight’s NonPro news. For the NonPro team, I’m Lindsey Saultz. Thanks for tuning in and stay weird world.