Am I the only one that thinks the founding fathers got it completely wrong with the amendment banning cruel and unusual punishment?
First off, are they banning punishment if it meets the criteria for being either cruel or unusual, or only if it’s both simulataneously? Let’s start with unusual… How are we defining unusual? With laws (and punishments) differing in different municipalities, counties, and states… how can you determine what is usual? PLUS, every so often, you hear on the news about a judge that exercises “creative sentencing.” What’s USUAL about that?
Frankly, I think we’ve already thrown “usual” out the window. There are few standards left in punishment. We send people to jail for years drug possession, while burnout celebrity starlets get an hour and a half in the slammer for potentially deadly DUIs. Nobody can predict who’s going to get punished for what and what that punishment is.
So, let’s move on to cruel. Now, isn’t the point of punishment to inflict some cruelty? Punishment was never intended to consist of a hug, a blow job, and a scholarship. It’s supposed to be something bad happening to you because you’ve done something bad. Kind of a policy of enforced karma, if you will. A few weeks ago I caught an article about prison inmates that were accusing the jail of cruel and unusual punishment because as punishment, they were given a food product called “nutraloaf” or something like that. More or less a meal blended into and cooked into loaf form.
So… being fed constitutes punishment now?
Part of the problem is that the amendment doesn’t leave any definitions as to what the founding fathers thought was cruel and unusual. This leaves a loophole for pretty much ANYONE in ANY SITUATION to cry and whine about supposed cruel and unusual punishment.
I hereby propose that this amendment be stricken, and that all punishment be standardized to being shot in the face.
Drug dealer – shoot him in the face
Shady contractor stealing from the government – shoot him in the face
Jaywalker – shoot him in the face
Returning library books late? – shot in the face
Seeing a pattern here?